Blueprint | November 13, 2023
Type Four: Common romantic pairings

What are the most common romantic pairings for Enneagram type 4s?

Female 4s most often marrying 8s, 9s, 1s, and 5s, and Male 4s most often marrying 2s, 8s, 1s, and 6s (in that order)

Certain type 4 pairings are more common than others, though any type combination can occur and thrive. The marriage data we compiled and analyzed was broken down by gender, with Female 4s most often marrying 8s, 9s, 1s, and 5s, and Male 4s most often marrying 2s, 8s, 1s, and 6s (in that order).

When we remove gender as a variable, 4s overall most often marry 8s, 1s, and 9s, and least often marry 4s, 7s, and 3s. All type combinations bring shared and unique elements to the relationship!

Most common:

4s and 8s share raw authenticity, intuition, vitality. 4s bring creativity, depth, sensitivity, while 8s bring action, practicality, solidity. 4s and 1s share idealism, vision, purpose. 4s bring spontaneity, emotion, acceptance, while 1s bring conscientiousness, logic, improvement. 4s and 9s share empathy, introspection, creativity. 4s bring raw authenticity, emotional depth, passion, while 9s bring positivity, acceptance, stability.


4s and 2s share creativity, sentimentality, passion. 4s bring philosophy, subtlety, raw emotion, while 2s bring sociability, practicality, affection. 4s and 5s share nonconformity, creativity, depth. 4s bring sensitivity, emotional depth, aesthetics, while 5s bring curiosity, stability, practicality. 4s and 6s share empathy, sentimentality, reassurance. 4s bring creativity, vulnerability, intuition, while 6s bring perseverance, vigilance, practicality.

Least common:

4s and 4s share creativity, sensitivity, vulnerability. 4s bring spontaneity, emotion, vitality, while other 4s bring introspection, philosophy, idealism. 4s and 7s share vision, curiosity, vitality. 4s bring mystery, intuition, emotional depth, while 7s bring confidence, positivity, resilience. 4s and 3s share culture, aesthetics, passion. 4s bring introspection, sensitivity, emotional depth, while 3s bring optimism, diplomacy, practicality.

Sources: "Are You My Type, Am I Yours?" by Elizabeth Wagele and Renee Baron,, and our own internal survey data.