Blueprint | November 10, 2023
Type Nine: Common romantic pairings

What are the most common romantic pairings for Enneagram type 9s?

Female 9s most often marrying 3s, 6s, 5s, 7s, and 8s, and Male 9s most often marrying 4s, 8s, 1s, 6s, and 7s (in that order).

Certain type 9 pairings are more common than others, though any type combination can occur and thrive. The marriage data we compiled and analyzed was broken down by gender, with Female 9s most often marrying 3s, 6s, 5s, 7s, and 8s, and Male 9s most often marrying 4s, 8s, 1s, 6s, and 7s (in that order).

Nines tend to be the universal donors of dating! They are compatible with the widest variety of types, and there are many pairings of even the less common combinations.

When we remove gender as a variable, 9s overall most often marry 6s, 8s, and 3s, and least often marry 5s, 2s, and 9s. All type combinations bring shared and unique elements to the relationship!

Most common:

9s and 6s share adaptability, reassurance, reliability. 9s bring stability, calm, positivity, while 6s bring sentimentality, activity, realism. 9s and 8s share independence, intuition, willpower. 9s bring optimism, receptiveness, calm, while 8s bring realism, action, vitality. 9s and 3s share adaptability, optimism, poise. 9s bring conscientiousness, acceptance, encouragement, while 3s bring confidence, action, vision.


9s and 7s share optimism, sociability, independence. 9s bring receptiveness, stability, conscientiousness, while 7s bring vitality, activity, openness. 9s and 4s share empathy, introspection, creativity. 9s bring positivity, acceptance, stability, while 4s bring raw authenticity, emotional depth, passion. 9s and 1s share endurance, self-improvement, altruism. 9s bring acceptance, positivity, harmony, while 1s bring conviction, realism, purpose.

Least common:

9s and 5s share independence, curiosity, perseverance. 9s bring warmth, idealism, positivity, while 5s bring raw authenticity, realism, analytic foresight. 9s and 2s share empathy, positivity, hospitality. 9s bring idealism, steadiness, independence, while 2s bring action, vitality, intimacy. 9s and 9s share conscientiousness, calm, acceptance. 9s bring sociability, willpower, activity, while the other 9s bring imagination, patience, altruism.

Sources: "Are You My Type, Am I Yours?" by Elizabeth Wagele and Renee Baron,, and our own internal survey data.