Blueprint | November 3, 2023
Why is my friend being distant?

I don’t understand why my friend is being distant with me. Did I do something wrong? There are many possible reasons but here are a few common reasons by Enneagram type:

Ones⁠

Personal reason

  • They feel uncomfortable with something you’ve said that reflects your moral position, and may want to resolve it first

Impersonal reason

  • They are feeling stressed or angry, and don’t want to burden others with their “negative” emotions

Twos⁠

Personal reason

  • They don’t feel appreciated by you, and may want you to reach out and acknowledge the

Impersonal reason

  • They are feeling overwhelmed by all of their social obligations and have oversubscribed their energy

Threes

Personal reason

  • They don’t feel important to you, so they may not invest as much in the relationship

Impersonal reason

  • They are highly focused on their work and goals, and in the midst of “grind mode”

Fours

Personal reason

  • They’re feeling alienated by you, so they may withdraw until you reach out

Impersonal reason

  • They are temporarily delving deep into their own projects or emotional landscape

Fives

Personal reason

  • They feel depleted by their interactions with you, so they may isolate until you establish a mutual interest or hobby

Impersonal reason

  • They’re heads-down in their work or projects, and don’t want to be disturbed

Sixes

Personal reason

  • They’re feeling uncertain of you, so they may be testy or unreliable until trust is reestablished

Impersonal reason

  • They’re feeling anxious about a relationship or situation in their life, which is consuming all of their mental capacity

Sevens

Personal reason

  • They’re feeling bogged down by your emotional negativity, and may want to focus on the positive aspects of their lives

Impersonal reason

  • They have packed their calendars to the brim with activities, and haven’t had a moment to think about anyone else

Eights

Personal reason

  • They’re feeling annoyed and imposed on by you, and may need time to get into a more relaxed headspace

Impersonal reason

  • They’re obsessed with taking action on projects or situations, and haven’t had a moment to think about anyone else

Nines

Personal reason

  • They’re feeling pushed on by you, and may need space to think and process

Impersonal reason

  • They’re recharging their energy with positive experiences or alone time